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Is it normal to use sex toys to reach orgasm during sex with a partner?

Yes. Period. It is completely normal to use sex toys during sex with a partner. Just as we are more likely to use sex toys when we masturbate, it is equally common for couples to bring sex toys into their play. Especially when it comes to the female orgasm during sex with a partner, it can be an advantage to use a clitoral vibrator to reach the seventh heaven.

What is the difference between a vibrator and a dildo? 

A vibrator contains one or more motors that enable it to vibrate. They come in many different sizes and shapes. Some for clitoral stimulation. For example, a wand or a clitoral vibrator that is typically palm shaped or bullet shaped. Other vibrators are suitable for penetration. For example, a g-spot vibrator or a Rabbit vibrator that stimulates the clitoris and g-spot simultaneously. A dildo, on the other hand, typically comes without vibration, produced in silicone with the shape of a penis and equipped with a suction base. Dildoes come in many shapes and sizes - some more lifelike and others more creative and playful. Some are flexible and bendable so that you can achieve the perfect shape to hit exactly your hot spots. As dildos have a suction base, they can be fastened to the body with a strap-on harness or attached to various surfaces and remain seated. 

My first dildo – what should I choose? 

A good place to start when buying your first dildo is to visit L For Love Boutique or your local sex shop to see and feel different models, so you get a better feel for which type of dildo speaks to you. You can think in advance about which size, shape or material might be appealing to you. If you are in doubt about the size or if it is the first time you are going to try penetration sex with a dildo, look for smaller models corresponding to approx. 2 fingers width. 

Can I make my own dildo?

There is plenty of scope for creativity when it comes to DIY sex toys. The fastest way to a homemade silicone dildo is to buy a kit, for example a Clone-a-Willy kit, where you can make a perfect cast of your own penis or any cylinder shape you want to cast. You can even combine some castings with a vibrator. You could also think more creatively and explore at your home space. You may find something delicious in your vegetable drawer. Maybe you have some drumsticks lying around. Or a massager, an electric toothbrush or your smartphone? Just remember to use a condom when you play around with your home equipment.  

May I
use the same vibrator/dildo for anal and vaginal sex?

You can use the same vibrator or dildo anally and vaginally, but you should be aware of a few things. Hygiene is the first point. If you use the same vibrator or dildo for both vaginal and anal sex, remember to clean your sex toy between uses or alternatively use a condom. Secondly, pay attention to whether your sex toy has a base when you use it for anal sex and penetration. If it does not have a base, e.g. an anchor or a suction base, it can disappear into the anus. 

What is a harness?

Strap-on-harness' can be divided into two categories: the adjustable ones, which are often produced in leather with buckles, and the size-specific ones, which are designed as underwear. Both types contain an O-ring, where the dildo can be placed so that it is attached to the body. It is important that your strap-on harness fits close to the body to achieve the best experience – for both you and your partner. 


What is a strap-on?

A strap-on is a dildo that is fastened to your body and gives you freedom of movement to explore sexual penetration - vaginal or anal - in new ways. There are different types and sizes of strap-on harnesses and dildos. Most dildos can be used as strap-ons. What’s important is that your dildo has a suction base so that it can be fastened in a harness. Dildos come in many shapes, colours and sizes. Some are more lifelike, while others are more adventurous and designed to stimulate the g-spot and/or p-spot. Some dildos are flexible, so you can design your perfect shape, others have a solid core with a soft and smooth surface. 


What is a double dildo?

With a double dildo you can enjoy a 100% harness-free experience that brings you and your partner closer to each other and ensures direct stimulation for both parties. They come in different shapes and sizes. Some are equipped with small, weighted balls inside to provide extra stimulation when moving. Others are equipped with a vibrator and some even with a remote control. Be aware that it is an advantage to have a strong pelvic floor to keep the double dildo in place. 

Which types of sex toys can I use with a partner?

There are a wide variety of different sex toys you can use with your partner. Including a couple’s vibrator, which for example can be a penis ring with clitoral stimulation so that both parties achieve simultaneous stimulation. It could also be a vibrator with two “legs”, where one stimulates the clitoris and the other the g-spot and penis during penetration. You can also use an anal plug or prostate massager with your partner. A couple’s vibrator can be either app or remote controlled. If you use your sex toy both anally and vaginally remember to use a condom for hygienic reasons.


Should I use a condom on a dildo?

Yes and no. If you use a silicone dildo, then you don’t have to use a condom. We recommend not sharing your sex toys with others. If you chose to do so, always remember to use a condom. 


Are butt plugs only for men? 

No. There are a wide variety of butt plugs that can be used by anybody. Though, prostate massagers are developed especially for stimulation of the p-spot with their curved shape. Generally, you can find butt plugs in all shapes, sizes and materials (silicone, ABS, glass and steel). Some also vibrate and can be remote controlled using an app or remote.  


How do I use a penis ring? 

A penis ring gives you a more sensitive and harder erection. Are you experiencing erection challenges, then a penis ring could help you last longer and increase your sensitivity. It must be applied using lube and can be worn both erect and non-erect. Penis rings are typically very flexible and stretchable and are available in different thicknesses and shapes.  

How do I use a masturbator? 

You can use a masturbator/sleeve to stimulate the penis. Some you can stroke along the penis and others you can use to enclose the penis giving a sensation similar to a blow job. They are available in all sorts of colours and shapes. Some have a very natural look, whereas others have a more spacy design. They are very flexible, and, like penis rings, they come with and without vibration.  


How do I use a massage candle and wax?

Massage candles consists of a solid oil that becomes liquid when heated and you can use to carefully drip all over your partner’s body. They are usually made of natural and plant-based wax and can be included in both romantic nights and kinky session.


What is silicone-based lube?

Silicone-based lube is oil-based. It has a good gliding effect, is scarce to use and does not dry out. It is especially good for anal sex and body massage. You can use silicone-based lube with sex toys made in glass or steel, but not with silicone products.  


What is water-based lube?

Water-based lube is water-based and comes in many different qualities, some organic and plant-based. It dries out faster than silicone-based lube but may be used with sex toys in all materials. Some lubes contain aloe vera, seaweed or hyaluronic acid, which binds moisture in the product and therefore gives an improved gliding effect.  


How do I clean my sex toys?

You can clean your sex toys using a mild intimate soap and lukewarm water. To disinfect your sex toys, we recommend using an anti-bacterial toy cleaner with green tea or tea tree oil extracts.  


How should I store my sex toys?

Store your sex toy in a storage bag, so that it avoids direct sunlight and dust. In this way, you protect the surface of the toy.   


Can I borrow others’ sex toys?

Yes, you may. But we do not recommend sharing sex toys. If you share your sex toys with others remember to use a condom. Does your friend have a favourite clitoris vibrator, that you wish to borrow, we recommend getting your own toy for hygienic reasons.  


Sex toys you find at home 

You can find a lot of stimulating objects at home. For example, pillows, furniture, wooden spoons, vegetables etc. We recommend using a condom with all objects you find at home. In relation to anal sex, it is very important that you do not stick something up your butt, which does not have a base, because you will risk it disappearing into the intestine. We advise using authorised and safe sex toys for hygienic and health reasons.